Happiness Happens
I am sure you have heard probable even used the term S_ _ _ Happens, well how about - Happiness Happens?
Happiness! Everyone wants it, searches for it, dreams of it and longs for it. One of my favorite recent authors is Peter Russell who has written a number of books that indirectly relate to self-development. I wouldnt however, call him a self-help author though or even a spiritual author. His work is more about how our search for outside stuff will hopefully eventually give us inside peace and happiness which is what he says ultimately everyone wants more than anything else in life.
So if happiness is what everyone is searching for why do so few people seem really, really happy?
Are you happy? I mean really happy? Most of the time or only when life is going well and circumstances are good? If you are happy why are you? If youre not, why arent you? Or, what will it take for you to once and for all find and keep this illusive, yet seemingly attainable state of mind and life?
I have been miserable. I have been happy. And, I have spent a lot of time in that limbo state of wanting to be happy but not knowing how to get there.
After extensive research and self-evaluation and contemplation, I am often accused of being too deep a thinker by some of my close friends, I think I have finally found an answer, notice I didnt say THE answer?
Happiness is not a thing, address, possession, bank balance, life position whether you are; retired, married, single, a parent, whatever. It is not something you can grasp, earn, keep, buy, learn, give away or know. Happiness is not anything that you go after. However, it will chase after you relentlessly if you have that inner mental state or consciousness that says: I am a happy person, I am happy - no matter what is going on in my life.
This does not mean to imply that you will be happy 24 hours a day, 365 days a year. That would not be life as it was designed to be. It would also be exhausting. However, I believe that we were meant to be happy as a life destiny. Pain, grief, sadness, solitude and yes, even loneliness, are all valuable contributors to a humble, joyous, compassionate, loving, balanced, productive and happy life.
You cannot totally experience the thrill of victory without ever tasting defeat. You cannot completely bask in the sunshine of success if you have never been brought to your knees. And, you cannot know fully the joy of a happy disposition, spirit and demeanor without ever knowing unhappiness.
Life is a wonderful adventure; filled with every imaginable emotion, experience, test, adversity, achievement, mistake, and success. Life is not, nor will ever be, perfect. Life is not a dress rehearsal for some later event. Life is now; what is happening now, what you are experiencing now, what you are learning now, what you are doing now, what you are dreaming now, and what you are afraid of now.
It is amazing to see some people who dont seem to have much or have accomplished much who regardless of their state of being or circumstances are happy. It is also interesting to see people who have more money, stuff, fame, power, success who still lack a happy spirit or demeanor. Why is this?
Simple folks, its proof that happiness is not gained by outside stuff but by inside contentment, acceptance and peace.
Happy people want more stuff, better stuff, nicer stuff but their happiness does not depend on its acquisition. They have not settled for less, they have decided that it is better to want and like what you have than not like what you want or get.
Please dont confuse happiness with a lack of drive, purpose or accomplishment. Please dont assume that you have to be someone better or have something else to be happy. You see, happiness happens.
Tim Connor, CSP is an internationally renowned sales, management and leadership speaker, trainer and best selling author. Since 1981 he has given over 3500 presentations in 21 countries on a variety of sales, management, leadership and relationship topics. He is the best selling author of over 60 books including; Soft Sell, Thats Life, Peace Of Mind, 81 Challenges Managers Face and Your First Year In Sales. He is also the CEO of ProfessionalSales Association Of America. He can be reached at tim@timconnor.com 704-895-1230 or visit his websites at http://www.timconnor.com or http://www.ProfessionalSalesAssociationOfAmerica.com
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